Triple Threads and What It Says About Us

To me, triple threads is that dreaded shit after a night of Mexican food. You know its coming, you prepare yourself for the pain, but in the end, it gets you all the same. This year is no different, and really, its says a lot about what Topps thinks about the collecting base. What I mean, is that by structuring the set the way that they have, it shows how little confidence Topps has in how people view each part of the card. Instead of focusing on putting together a top notch design, they thought that jam packing needless junk and gimmicks were more important than a good looking set. From the reaction I have seen, it worked.

The most talked about part of the product is always the “OMG SIKX MOJOS!” that supposedly litter this set. They have about a thousand different 1/1s, each one more ridiculous than the next. Before this year, it was only limited to single and bifold cards, but Topps felt that two entire cards were NOT enough for the junk they had in store, thus leading to the first tri-folds. Stupidly, the tri-fold cards feature little more than a border to encompass the jumbo patches of the card, and that’s pretty much all they have to offer. Topps has basically implied that collectors only want the biggest possible patches with the most colors, and that putting a good looking card together is meaningless. This means there is only a dime-sized player pic, no autograph, and zero concept. What you have to replace that is just the biggest, gaudiest, most ridiculous looking patches that I have ever seen. Never before have I thought to myself how shitty a whole Marlin patch looks when its next to two other similar patches. Its almost like Topps said, “Well, these cards are going to look like crap, make sure there are whole patches on there to shut them up. They are like babies with shiny or glittery things, this will be like crack to them.”

Moving on, the design is almost identical with previous years. There has been ZERO update to the concept of what normal people will get in each pack. You get a tri relic card with some shit spelled out in confusing die cut windows, and an auto tri relic of some guy with some shit spelled out in confusing die cut windows. Aside from the checklist being complete poop, and aside from the fact that there are very few baseball players who can carry a high end set, there isn’t anything in this set that hasn’t been done before. They also went with a stupid partial medieval theme this year with scrolls and shields and crap like that. I say partial because the other cards have a completely clashing identity of linear boxes and junk. Of course, none of this means anything to the people who buy Triple Threads, mainly because they only care about how many windows are on the card. No matter that there is barely a player picture, or a cohesive thought to bring the card together, all they want is relic. Relic, relic and more relic. I say relic, because Topps doesn’t always use game pieces for this set, instead using old timer game jerseys, event jerseys, and practice jerseys. Again, none of this matters because the people who buy this junk have no concept of what should matter.

When you move away from the horrid relic cards, you see that there is still no on card autographs for this set. Even though Topps has the resources to do it, they care more about stocking their storeroom when they meet with a player rather than doing something for you the collector. Not only that, but the stickers bring your focus on the card because they are cut into the fucking design. Each auto card has a cut out spot for the sticker, instead of disguising it like it should be. Why do I want a card that blatantly shows everyone that the prized auto is just a label stuck on by someone in China? That makes no sense to me.

Triple Threads is also single handedly responsible for the parallel hell that so many of us hate. Each of the 300 or so cards has at least 10 parallels, including 5 1/1s – FOR EACH CARD. That’s 4 printing plates and a regular platinum parallel. Seriously, how does anyone think this is okay? Its worse than Panini, and I cringe each time some idiot screams “MOJOOOOOOOO!” when he pulls a Adam Lind 1/1 triple relic printing plate that he can sell for five dollars. Give me a fucking break.

Lastly, the price point continues to be a complete joke. For 170+ dollars, all you get is one autograph and one crappy one color jersey card. If you are lucky you can pull one of the hundreds of worthless players on the checklist, who have up to four cards each in some cases. Then, there is a one per case triple auto that has three players that are drawn out of a hat, and sells for ten bucks, or a 1/1 card that may or may not make you have a seizure from looking at it. The fact is, 95% of the time, you are going to pull less than 20 dollars worth of cards from your box, and even if you pull a 1/1 “REDICOLOUS MOJO” card, its going to look like poop.

I cant say enough bad things about Triple Threads and Topps Sterling, because they are like the Michael Bay movies of the card collecting world. There is a lot of needless action, but when standing alone on a concept, everything falls apart. Right, Transformers 2? Triple Threads is like that, and its an insult to my intelligence that it is always shoved down our throats for 3 sports each fucking year. In fact, my golden rule of Topps was created around this product. In the future, I would hope that collectors realize that supporting Michael Bay Threads means that more of it will come, just like every goddamn needless sequel in Hollywood. Please don’t give them that satisfaction.

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